This is what happens when you have an EEG if you're me.

First, they show you to a room that has a bed they can jack up. If you're very lucky, your Dad can take the day off and hang out on the bed with you. If you are very, VERY lucky, they let you play with a hospital calculator.

Then your mother will probably take a lot of pictures with her phone. And she will tell you that this is the weird hair thing with a towel and some wet stuff that they've been talking about for a week. It's not quite how they said it would be, but it's not too bad. Besides, did I mention the calculator?

There will be wires and stuff, but in between all the picture taking your Mom may offer you special treats, which I suggest you grab. For me it was a book about the alphabet and lollipops to go with the calculator. There will probably be a nice lady they are trying to distract you from, for me the nice lady was Miss Melissa.

Another perk at your EEG might be television. This is definitely a bonus, especially if you schedule in the morning when all the good TV like Sesame Street is on. And would you believe that today's Elmo's World is about Going To The Doctor?

They will probably wrap your head in some white stuff that they will tell you is a towel but I think it is gauze. It is warm and itches a little but as long as that nice lady stays away from the front of the television we're cool.

Your Dad may or may not wear some funny glasses. I pretended not to notice. He wore them the whole time.

When they are done with you, which may take up a whole Sesame Street and a little bit of Clifford The Big Red Dog, they will take off the white stuff, and then the wires with goop that probably nobody will mention and then there will be some kind of hair rinsing in the sink and a promise of chocolate milk. Hold them to that one.

And then you're done. The nice lady will probably tell you a doctor will call your Mom and Dad with the results next week although nobody will probably remember to tell you. But they will give you that chocolate milk, tell you what a great kid you are and then take you to Cracker Barrel or somewhere just as good. And it will be easy, really. The wires aren't so bad.

And your Mom will probably always remember this day and a picture like this the most, where she thought you looked so small and made her want to hug you forever.

j*

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