Is it me?

We are the parents of a wonderful boy with special needs. Our J is twenty two years old and severely involved. Over the years we have learned to adapt to the differences in caring for special child versus our older son (also special just not special needs ; ) ). As the years went by we continually adjusted our expectations and learned to rejoice in the little victories...a day without siezures, a smile, etc. With every year we are grateful for the fact that he is here with us despite the dire predictions of our early medical team (dismissed for their negativity).I know for a fact that we are MUCH better people thanks to our J . Now all that being said here is the one thing that we can not get used to and has become a very sore point..well meaning people who look at our son and ask things like "how do you do it?", or "it must be so hard ". Our son is not a burden, he is our son. How do we do it? Really? If you don't go around asking people with "normal" kids how they can "do" it, please don't ask me. Don't tsk tsk as we go by, don't call me a saint for choosing to stay home and care for my son, and stop looking at us with pity. J is a gift that we were given.